Life Outside Social Media

Self-Love is Selfless Love

     If you ask me if I'd rather be with someone I love but I’m not loved back or someone who loves me but I don’t love them back, I'd choose the first. People always think of relationships as a give-and-take arrangement as if it's a 50/50 business partnership – if one is giving more than the other, then there comes a breach of trust. Why is it so hard for us to give without expecting anything in return? Perhaps, we feel like we deserve to be rewarded when we treat others with our utmost love and attention, which makes sense because we live in a society molded by binary thinking. It's as if a relationship either has to be built on fair shares or none at all, and frankly, I find that incredibly restricting and unwholesome. 

     I must admit that in my own relationship, I've certainly felt like I love my partner way more than he loves me, which would often bring me down considerably, but upon moments of self-reflection shortly after, I always successfully convince myself that the way people feel about me doesn't reflect my worthiness to be loved. I've fought a long and hard battle to be happy with who I am, and now that I'm finally in a position where I truly know I'm worth loving, all I want is to radiate the love I have for myself towards those who mean volumes to me, particularly my significant other. From now on, at times when I don't feel wanted, I will continue to give because I see worth in people who may not always see it in themselves. Call it self-destructive if you will, but my decision to love selflessly is rooted from years of building myself up to a point where I know I'm enough even when my feelings won't always be reciprocated. 

     It takes a great deal of strength and vulnerability to love without expectations, and I'm willing to take on the challenge of giving it as long as it is accepted. It's time to stop thinking of love as a transaction or a debt that needs to be paid because it's one of the few valuable things in life that should come for free. 

Thursday, March 15, 2018




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